In The Buzz Cut, we give hot takes on all of the intellectual and Internet-famous, celebrity and bizarre, buzzy and overlooked family and parenting news we gossiped about over lunch all week.

Because it’s never too early to speculate on a woman’s plans for children! The media is already talking about whether or not 2-year-old Princess Charlotte’s hypothetical future children will get titles; they won’t, thanks to a law that only allows titles to be inherited from princes or bestowed on the wives of princes. Phew, glad we got that sorted out 20+ (or never) years in advance.

Speaking of catching them while they’re young. Amazon has now introduced a way for ‘teens to shop independently’ — a service that allows kids as young as 13 to browse and select under their own account, then allows parents to approve the purchase and/or set a spending limit. Wouldn’t it just be easier not to give teens access to our credit card numbers/Amazon accounts, but allow them independence in more meaningful ways like, say, helping them set up and manage a bank account of their own? Nice try, corporate behemoth.

Permanent love. This dad got his young daughter’s artwork tattooed on his arm. At least it’s less embarrassing than Drake’s dad’s tattoo.

Motherhood isn’t universal. Sarah Silverman doesn’t regret choosing her career over motherhood. But the 46-year-old stand-up comedian still credits the moms who somehow manage to do it all.  “I have working female friends with children — I don’t understand how they do it. It’s great they’re able to, but they’ve all made real sacrifices.”

The perfect venue for pregnant foodies. This meal looks delicious. Its price? At least one baby.

Wonder Woman’s daughter: Totally unimpressed. “Every woman is wonder woman!” says Gal Gadot’s daughter. Preach.

Elon Musk’s mother becomes new face of CoverGirl. Badass and beautiful 69-year-old model becomes latest (and oldest ever) face of CoverGirl. There, we fixed it for you.

Enough with the parent-shaming. In Australia, a dad trying to change his son’s nappy got kicked out a mall’s family room by a mom who called him a ‘sicko.’ Wtf, lady. Let a man take care of his baby!

Embarrassing. Vogue is asking: Are Beyoncé and Blue Ivy the next mother-daughter power couple? Ummm, Vogue, you’re a season behind … aren’t they already?

Taking home food to another level. A Mumbai restauranteur hired his mom as his head chef. Aw.

Paving the road to hell. UP Minister Om Prakash Rajbhar — good intentions, terrible ideas. There are better ways to get kids in school than starving and imprisoning parents who don’t send them.

Speak of the devil. Hollywood producer Harvey Chapman’s wife, Georgina Chapman, is leaving him after a torrent of actresses, models and employees have come forward with their accounts of his sexual harassment and assault. “Caring for my young children is my first priority and I ask the media for privacy at this time,” said the fashion designer.